Maybe Ghost Story's Aren't the Best Bedtime Story's

by Tales From The Script
originally published at 03:44PM on Sunday, September 23, 2007

Her parents were going out of town, the sleep over was her moms ideal. Her friends fell asleep first, leaving her awake, alone in a strange new house.
Trees branches tapped against the windows, while rain beat heavily on the roof.
Her room was dark, the moonlight only streaming in seconds at a time casting ghostly shadows on the walls.
A thump came from the attic above her, then foot steps, Alice jumped up and reached for her phone it was dead. She woke Judy and Kay, ” I heard something and.” “Your nuts” Kay said, “go back to sleep.
Someone pounded on the front door. ” The phones dead,” Alice said. The girls moved to the door peeking into the hall.
Alice inched her way to the edge stairs, squinting to see, lightening illuminated the house. A man stood at the foot of the stairs in a deep lingering, haunting voice he called, “I have come for you .” He started up the stairs.
She screamed and turned to run, the attic door thrust open an icy cold blast of air wraped around her body, she vanished.

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Comments

  • from blueyedwonder:

    add quotations, please, to make it easier to understand what’s going on.

  • from YodaOnCrack:

    There are some great ideas and images in this ficlet. I agree with blueyedwonder that it would likely read better if edited for formatting – but a great entry for this… Nice work.

  • from Tales From The Script:

    Is this better?

  • from Kermitgorf:

    “Your nuts Kay said, go back to sleep. put quotes around nuts” and “go
    Change ideal to idea.
    good edge of your seat ficlet. intense. good ending.

  • from PW101:

    I like it!!!

  • from User 4095:

    Spooky!! Good writing. Get ready for halloween!!

  • from User 4095:

    I love it