by Frostbite
originally published at 09:22PM on Wednesday, September 26, 2007


...of all humanity had come. OK, so it really wasn’t that serious, but I had been woken up from sleep, and I was seething. “If its that toaster again I’m going to scream!” My mind traveled back to the great toaster revolution of 2015, and ever since then I had despised the little creatures, always plotting their revenge and burning my toast to an inedible crisp that no normal human could consume. I mean really, why is that ‘dark’ setting there anyway? If I wanted my bread to be reduced to its basic elemental components, I would just get a block of carbon to munch on… but that was beside the point.

Directly in front of the point laid my glasses, and seeing as how I needed them for seeing, it remained to be seen whether the dead cactus on my floor would ever be moved. That thing had been there for months and no one wanted to touch it.

Soon I started to wonder if any of this was possible, or if I was just really bored and wrote the first thing on my mind. To explain I will start at the beginning…




  • from Brebelles:

    omg!! hilarious

  • from Spence:

    Yeah, random describes it. Very funny man, nice job!

    and breaking the fourth wall ftw!

  • from A Joker:

    I prefer my humor darker, but then again, im insane. Good job. I love the sense of reality you’ve established, and the word pictures are very professional.

  • from Saint Chuck:

    The world always needs a spur of randomosity…Great work.

  • from Luuvvxiz_90:

    i love the word random and anything that ensues! great job. all in the name of toast and toe jam!