The Insane Knight Gets Lost

by Hobo Beard Bob
originally published at 11:09AM on Tuesday, October 30, 2007

“Fazpagarg!” the Insane Knight exclaimed. Whenever he reached a point of total frustration, he would swear in gibberish. In their quest to find the Great Wizard, Ted the Off-White, they had gotten lost in The Boring Forest. The Dragon named Horse had refused to walk any further, so they decided to dismount and set up camp.

“Maybe we should have asked directions back in Avaloniaburgtown,” said Tlod, the formerly headless, dwarven zombie.

The Insane Knight walked over to the campfire to warm his hands when the flame started to rise out of control. The flames morphed into a humanoid form and it spoke.

“THE GREAT WIZARD , TED THE OFF -WHITE, DEMANDS THAT YOU STOP THIS QUEST IMMEDIATELY .”

The Insane Knight laughed as he turned to Tlod and said, “Ha Ha! Our campfire is talking! Ha Ha Ha! Have you ever seen anything so foolish? I better put it out before it starts singing!”

“Sir,” Tlod said, “That’s a Fire Elemental. We should run!”

The Knight drew his Imaginary Sword and shouted, “En Garde, Campfire!”

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Sequels

Comments

  • from Lone Writer:

    I have read eery single one of this series and I LOVE it!

  • from Lone Writer:

    Whoops! I meant every!

  • from Alexa ♥:

    I am so glad you’re writing these again. I read them on my cell phone and sometimes I laugh too loud on the bus, but it’s still worth it.

  • from Kermitgorf:

    my favorite series by far!

  • from thebetweenspace:

    I love the things that the Insane Knight considers to be insane, like elemental fires. And that imaginary sword is getting plenty of use. I wonder if he’s conjured the elemental fire himself or if Ted the Off-White did.

  • from thebetweenspace:

    I love the things that the Insane Knight considers to be insane, like elemental fires. And that imaginary sword is getting plenty of use. I wonder if he’s conjured the elemental fire himself or if Ted the Off-White did.