Stiff

by Hobo Beard Bob
originally published at 03:45PM on Monday, December 17, 2007 mature

I stared down at the lacy gift from Jenna Jr. and laughed to myself. This bitch could not take a hint. I wasn’t interested in some guy’s sloppy seconds. I definitely wasn’t interested in the STDs that probably came along with it. I tried turning her down nicely, now I was gonna have to be rude.

When I went to knock on their door I noticed that it was already cracked.

“Hello?” I said as I knocked lightly. The knock opened the door a little farther. I could see the poor bastard that must have been on the receiving end of last night’s romp. He was lying face-down on the bed, asleep.

“I think your girl lost these,” I said. I leaned into the room and tossed the thong on the bed next to him.

I almost turned to leave; In retrospect, maybe I should have, but the guy was a little too still. I walked over to the bed and shook him. He was cold to the touch. Bitch must have fucked him to death, I thought.

The approaching sirens told me that I was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Prequels

Sequels

Comments

  • from Kermitgorf:

    S ome funny lines for sure.

  • from Fyora Cartagan:

    Oh shoot! I actually don’t think I saw that coming.

  • from Nightengail2012:

    Wow. Who ever knew you could use such fowl language and still have a great story :P

  • from Alexa ♥:

    I can’t read the whole thing (it’s late)! I’m very upset, because your section certainly makes me want to read all of it.
    .
    I need an Internet.

  • from RunningWithScissors:

    ahahahahahahahh. poor buddy.
    extremely interesting turn here..

  • from Crown Me Tarzan, King of Mars:

    Excellent sequel. Love the title!

  • from thebetweenspace:

    That was awesome. Great sequel, talk about being in the wrong place at the wrong time.