A Frog With Teeth

by Mrs. Fitzwilliam Darcy
originally published at 11:46PM on Sunday, January 06, 2008 mature

The frog leaped at the Count’s purple neck. It gripped a hold with it’s vampire-like teeth and bit down with all of its strength. I suppose this frog now has teeth he though as he felt the teeth digging into his cloth skin.

“One…two…three. Three bites. Ahahahaha.? He declared in his Transylvanian chortle. The count rubbed his neck, feeling the cotton-like substance leaking from his wounds. The feral frog continued to glare at him with his googley red beady eyes from the pavement.

“One…two. Two glaring eyes. Ahahaha.?

Danny and Ray ran out of the morgue to see the cloaked purple figure and the frog looking at each other fixated.

“Dude, should we call like PETA or someone?? Danny asked his co-worker.

“If we call them they are going to send us to a mental hospital.? Ray replied. The frog hopped around and then looked right at the two men standing in the doorway of the morgue. He took a few hops towards them.

“One…two…three hops. Ahaha?

“Shit man,? Ray whispered.

The frog sped at them.


  • from BernerOberland:

    funny wickedly funny

  • from THX 0477:

    Great addition, great addition. I love the confused and frightened perspective of these two non-muppets. ‘Dude, should we call like PETA or someone?’ Great line. Awesome.

  • from Sailor Emo:

    When I first read it I thougth it said PTA … NIGHTMARES !

  • from Jenunique:

    I love the idea of an amphibian vampire.