Ficlets

Superhero Obituaries - "Free" Willy McGee

San Diego, CA – Ambiguous, swinging superhero “Free” Willy McGee was found dead in the tiger cage of the San Diego zoo, the victim of an apparent lover’s quarrel. The suspected tiger had no comment.

McGee is best known for his hand in the daring exodus of Shamu from Sea World and also the shocking sex scandal, which later emerged after tapes of himself and Shamu surfaced on YouTube.

Gerald Jorkins, spokesperson of PETA , had conflicting emotions concerning the death. “Liberator or villain, it’s hard to say. One thing we can say is he did love animals.”

The funeral will be held Tuesday at Mission Beach, where his remains will be scattered into the ocean, perhaps his dying wish. Although there are no known survivors, a memorial fund is in place pending the results of a DNA test on an odd newly evolved animal species some scientists are dubbing, “The most hideous creatures we’ve ever seen.”

“If this is the result of free love,” Captain Obvious, a friend of the deceased, commented, “I’ll stick with my wife.”

View this story's 5 comments.