part two

by Susan Holder is terrific
originally published at 01:32AM on Saturday, April 28, 2007 mature

“Take a deep breath. Three… Two…. One… Now, wake up.”

The colors, vivid before my eyes, fade. The life I had seen disappears. A coarse pillow with hatched print against my face… too close to get a clear picture of. Dark room, shadows, light trying hard to peek through blinds shut so long that the room seems perpetually dusk.

“Why am I here? I don’t want to be here. This is none of your business. Please get out.. Get out of my mind!! Stop doing this!!

“You need to get this out. Talk about it!”

“NO.. This isn’t your life. These aren’t your thoughts, this isn’t…. please!!!.... just…. let me leave.”

Hold the pillow closer. The agony in my stomach, the pain… it won’t go away. I have to hide it. Please God.. let this be done. I don’t want to think. I don’t want to relive this again. Just… let me forget.

“Now.. I am going to count to three. When I get to three, you are going to go into a trance again.”