I never wanna leave.
I wish I could just stay here eating burnt microwave popcorn, and watching crude comedies, on the worlds softest couch with Sean.
I can’t leave, because I know the second he’s not here to make me laugh I’ll start thinking about Matt again.
The worst thing about Matt is that he thinks we’re still friends.
he calls me every night to talk about “his girl” and I’m sitting there dying a litle more with each word.
I can’t step up and say this is too hard, because I can’t lose him. I’de rather have a deadly friendship than nothing at all.
I’de like to say Matt broke my heart, but that would be a lie.
More like every single bone in my body, than every internal oregan I have. That would be a better description of the crippling pain he continues to cause me.
I realized that when I’m with Sean the pain doesn’t stop. No no it will never do that. But it does fade to a dull roar. He’s like my anesthetic, but I can’t let myself get addicted.
“Can I make dinner?”
Its to be a feast