The Salem Veggie Trials!

by NightMaiden
originally published at 06:05AM on Tuesday, June 17, 2008

I was currently sprawled over Algebra homework, equations swirling through my head in a colorful vortex.

I rubbed my temples, and mumbled irritatedly to myself. I got up, tripped on Coco on my way to the kitchen, and smacked my face right into a wad of half-frozen lettuce.

Oh, ha, ha. I thought, and pulled my face (which was now a soggy mess) out of the defrosting lettuce.

“KAZUMA!” I yelled, and the rafters shook.

“What?” a weary voice answered.

“What is lettuce doing on the counter?” I shouted, and spat out a stray leaf of the vegetable.

“It’s for my lunch salad,” he replied.

“Well, not anymore, unless you want Chanel powder vinaigrette on your lettuce,” I answered, feeling slightly goaded.

Kazuma’s head popped out from around the corner, looking a little peaked. “What did you do?”

“It wasn’t me! The evil thing smacked me in the face,” I said, pointing to the head of lettuce accusingly.

“Oh, yes…we’ll have cannibalistic tomatoes next.”

“We need help, don’t we?”

“I’m afraid so.”