Today? I’ll be in a good mood when I get home. Even though my mood begins to sour at the mere thought of going home, I optimistically tell myself that today will be much different.

Today I’ll walk in and not notice the cigarette burns in the carpet or the hair on the soap. I won’t notice the smell of nail polish or perm solution. I’ll be greeted with a firm hug and soft kiss. Happy. Yeah! That’s the ticket!

I’m not a pathological liar but given recent events, I’m apparently pathologically delusional! Using the old SNL phrase actually makes me snicker slightly, helping my delusion.

I pull up to the house, something seems odd. I can sense that something is different. The house seems lighter; lighter in bulk but also color. “Odd”, I tell myself. Odd but, liberating? Is that what I’m feeling? Liberation?

I enter cautiously; taking my time will preserve my mood bump a little longer. In the front hall I drop my keys in the ashtray out of habit. In front of me a grease-stained notepad shouting “I’M OUT !”