I wake up and instantly notice the ceiling above me, it’s not my ceiling. I’ve woken up under a ceiling and it’s not the ceiling that I pay good money for, what’s that all about?

I’ve got a pounding headache, and I start thinking about getting painkillers out of my bedside table when I realise that that’s probably not here either, that’s an unknown distance away, under my ceiling.

That beeping isn’t helping, that bloody endless beeping. Maybe if I find the source of that damned noise I could make it stop. I look to my left, oh it’s a heart monitor, I probably don’t want that noise to stop then.

Why am I this close to a heart monitor? I mean, that’s not good news is it? I guess I’m in a hospital, but why? I press the call button for answers, no one comes. I do feel a lot better about the situation though, so I press it a few more times.

“Mr Lane, please stop pressing the morphine button.”

“Mr. Lane was my father.” I slur at the pretty nurse. “You may call me…whenever you like. Where’s my ceiling?”