Pour ‘em out, count ‘em up,
Sort ‘em by their size.
Eye each one, pop it in,
Great for aches and lies.

One for the marriage that didn’t work,

One for the affair with the front desk clerk,

One for the interview that failed on sight,

One for the crying on your pillow at night.

Two for those wasted college years,

Three for all the normal tears and fears,

Four for the severance, running out,

Five for the times you scream and shout – !

…Pour ‘em out, count ‘em up,
Sort ‘em by their size.
Eye each one, pop it in,
How many till you die?